Thea’s story 

Gender: Trans Woman

Sexuality: Panromantic Gray-Ace

Pronouns: She/Her

Home & From: Virginia Beach, Virginia

Cultural Background/Identity: Virginia Beach?

Interests: Design, Science, Food, Philosophy

My name is Thea Ross (she/her), and my journey has been about becoming – not just discovering myself, but finding ways to lift others along the way.  I’ve spent my whole life in Virginia Beach, and as a trans woman, my path to understanding and embracing my identity has been full of challenges, lessons, and moments of joy. My transition, which really started when I was around 30, wasn’t just about becoming more myself – it was also about self-care, community building, and creating spaces where others could thrive.

My experiences have taught me the profound value of safe spaces, direct support, and visible affirmation.  This inspired me to start The Calos Coalition, a nonprofit dedicated to trans empowerment and joy.  Our mission is clear and powerful: to spread trans joy by providing direct aid, connecting LGBTQIA+ folks with allies, and promoting inclusive spaces.

One of the projects I’m most proud of at Calos is the Trans Wish List, a unique platform that connects trans community members directly with supportive allies who can help fulfill specific, vetted wishes. It’s about ensuring every voice matters and receives the support and recognition they deserve.  Another favorite of mine is our monthly Trans Family Dinners: welcoming gatherings filled with warmth, acceptance, laughter, and connection, offering trans youth and families a safe and joyful space to simply be themselves.

My personal journey with gender deeply shapes my advocacy. I intimately know the vulnerability, challenges, and triumphs of transition, and also the incredible peace of finally feeling at home within myself and my community. Beyond my work with Calos, I’m passionate about human rights and policy advocacy, advocating for inclusive legislation and policies that uplift everyone. Serving on the board of the 757 Creative ReUse Center also lets me blend my commitment to sustainability with creativity and community engagement.

Outside of activism and advocacy, I’m also someone who loves the simple joys in life, like tacos, my culinary comfort food of choice. These small joys remind me that real change comes from genuine connections and shared moments.

Partnering with Jayme Drew and being a part of All The Genders Photo Project represents another step in both my and Calos’ ongoing commitment to visibility and authenticity. I’m inspired by Jayme’s incredible ability to travel, capture, and share the diverse and powerful stories of the entire extended trans family. My hope is that our shared efforts resonate deeply, encouraging and celebrating everyone who is navigating their unique journey. There’s no single way to be trans or express gender, and the potential within our community is limitless.

In every part of my life – advocacy, wellness, creating inclusive spaces – I strive to embody the core belief of Calos: that true beauty, or “Kallós” as the ancient Greeks called it, exists both inside and out, beyond gender and stereotypes; it shines from within. I’m proud to stand visibly and authentically, encouraging others to embrace their truths, and building a world that celebrates every unique journey.

PHOTOGRAPHER’S NOTE:  This week, I really needed to circle back to Thea’s story. Lately it’s felt like the U.S. is scary enough to make me want to crawl back into the closet, but Thea reminds me why visibility matters. She embodies the kind of courage that lifts everyone around her, even when everything in life is really hard.

I’ve also embraced the idea of Trans Family Dinners here in Southeast Virginia.  Many of us don’t have strong support systems in our biological families, so we turn to community to create chosen families. That’s not always an easy process for me, particularly when I want to withdraw from the world when things get hard, but it gets a little easier when I can show up to a Sunday dinner, mingle in my awkward fashion with strangers and familiar faces alike, and still feel at home.