Mel Howard’s story

Gender:  Trans man, at one point I referred to myself as FTM, prior to that Non Binary, some forms require me to put Assigned Female at Birth, (why IDK when I do not identify as female) My insurance still has me listed as Female for coverage when I put down and is seen as Male for coverage in care. 

Sexuality: Pansexual who is married to a Trans woman because I am attracted to men and women and my partner doesn’t determine my sexuality

Pronouns: He/ Him/ King/ Monarch

Home:  In the heart of downtown Newport News, right in the core of the hood, I rest easy.  I’m originally from Newport News – when I originally started to transition 15 years ago; I moved to Richmond to gain access to care and then once I received it, I returned home. 

Cultural background/identity:  I identify as a trans man of color, and that identity carries the weight of a history that’s both seen and unseen. My roots run deep, stretching beyond what colonized eyes could ever comprehend. My ancestors were labeled as slaves, negros, and worse, by those who sought to strip them of their humanity. I am Black because my skin is brown, a living testament to resilience and beauty. My grandmother traced stories of family members bound as indentured servants, and my mother attended segregated schools. Yet, the origin story of how we stepped off those ships, or the lives we led before is lost, stolen by the silence of history erased.

I hold onto the knowledge that there were Black tribes here before the colonizers came. My father’s side has Native American ties, though much of that culture’s threads are frayed, leaving Blackness as the only unbroken connection, my identity, my anchor, my truth for the world to see.

Being queer flows through my blood and breathes life into my being, even when it’s not seen or respected. People assume, project, and dismiss but let it be known: I am unapologetically here. When disrespect shows up, I stand rooted as a queer n*gga ready to defend my existence, unshaken by threats. If survival is a choice, I will always choose me every single time.

Mel’s Interests: Advocacy, community building, public speaking, event planning, volunteer work when my needs are met, workshop facilitation, event planning, poetry, cooking, networking, storytelling, mentorship and coaching

As the Executive Director of Thriving Transmen of Color (TTMOC), my work is rooted in passion, purpose, and a deeply personal connection to the community I serve. Leading this organization has been one of the most transformative experiences of my life, allowing me to channel my lived experiences into creating spaces where trans men of color can thrive unapologetically.

I was born and raised in Newport News, Virginia, a place that shaped my resilience and sense of identity. I began my transition in Richmond, Virginia, during my early twenties, a period of profound self-discovery and growth. Navigating the intersectional challenges of systemic racism, transphobia, and societal expectations fueled my passion for advocacy and my determination to create a better world for others like me, trans men of color striving to be seen, respected, and valued.

At TTMOC, I’ve dedicated myself to addressing the unique challenges our community faces: barriers to healthcare, housing, employment, and mental health resources. I’ve made it my mission to ensure that our voices whether Black, Latinx, Indigenous, or Asian are amplified and respected. My leadership isn’t just about running an organization; it’s about building a movement, one rooted in resilience, visibility, and the belief that we deserve not only to survive but to thrive.

One of my proudest accomplishments has been the future launching of the Rising Together Initiative. This program aims to provide mentorship, skills training, and financial resources to trans men of color, helping us step into our power as leaders and changemakers. I’ve worked hard to forge partnerships with corporations, healthcare providers, and community leaders to make this program impactful and sustainable. Watching its success grow and seeing the lives it has touched has been one of the most rewarding parts of my work.

 For me, leadership means showing up with authenticity and boldness. I lead by example, whether that’s facilitating workshops on self-advocacy, mentoring young trans men, or challenging systemic inequities in healthcare and beyond. Every step I take as a leader is guided by the values of resilience and community. I want those I work with to see that thriving is possible, even in a world that sometimes seems determined to erase us.

I also believe in the power of storytelling. Sharing my personal journey – both the struggles and triumphs, is a way for me to connect with others and break down barriers. Whether I’m speaking at conferences, participating in panel discussions, or simply engaging on social media, I use my voice to challenge stereotypes and empower others.

My vision for TTMOC is bold and boundless: I want to build a world where trans men of color are celebrated, respected, and supported as vital contributors to society. For me, thriving isn’t just about surviving the day-to-day it’s about creating joy, strength, and solidarity that will inspire future generations. I take pride in knowing that through my work, I’m helping to build that legacy.

January 2025